Dear Kent Middle School Families,

At some point your family has likely engaged in the conversation that we all have with our middle school children: When is the appropriate time to introduce a cell phone into your middle schooler’s life? There are many variables that parents/guardians consider, and ultimately each family determines what feels right for each one of their children. This decision alone may have the most significant impact on the remainder of your student’s childhood, more than perhaps any other change we introduce in the middle school years.

There are many benefits to owning a smartphone, yet there are also many drawbacks and an appropriate level of maturity is required to realize the positives without getting overwhelmed by the negatives. As a middle school administrator, I get to see some of the most significant examples of when smartphones introduce danger into children’s lives. When digital communication outside of school starts to have an impact on students’ time while at school, it becomes our collective obligation to respond. This school year alone I have encountered hate speech directed between students, anonymous online cruelty of teachers and students, sharing of explicit photographs with and without student permission, viewing and sharing of online pornography, purchasing of dangerous objects from online marketplaces, vulgar and hateful comments in text threads, and scheduled in-person meet-ups with strangers met online. Each of these examples happened in our own community of Kent students and came to my attention prior to the attention of the participating child’s family in most instances. Most of these examples happened with students in 5th through 7th grades.

We work to navigate through each circumstance with the children involved, committed to identifying key learning opportunities that will help students make safe choices going forward, yet by the time situations such as these have come to my attention much damage has already been done. I also realize that what gets brought to my attention reflects only a small fraction of the full reality of what our children are encountering in their digital lives.

So, whenever you decide that your child is ready for a smartphone, I implore our parents/guardians to set the expectation that trust is earned and that there is no expectation of privacy in our children’s digital lives. There are simply too many dangers and too much left to learn for our children to exist in digital space completely unsupervised. For families of children who already have smartphones, parents should periodically read and monitor their child’s text messages, social media content, app usage, and any tools frequently used on their child’s smartphone. Express curiosity about your child’s digital life just as you do about their analog life, and be prepared to respond without judgment when something difficult may be uncovered. Our children deserve guidance in this area of their lives, not criticism.

Each family must carefully consider when it is right to introduce a smartphone into their child’s life. Simply put, children must have developed the appropriate maturity to be able to safely navigate the circumstances they will encounter through the use of a smartphone. Many Bacich and Kent families have taken the Wait Until 8th pledge as a way of showing their commitment to withhold access to a personal smartphone until their children are in 8th grade. This approach significantly reduces exposure to harmful content, delays the distractions and addictions that come with smartphone use, and prolongs childhood just a little bit longer.

Thank you for your partnership in this complicated task of raising and educating our children in the 21st century.